AT&T, a leading provider of cell phones and cell phone plans, today announced that it has simplified its data plans into three tiers, providing its customers with greater value than ever before:
Data Basic For $20/month, you get 0 KB of data.
At long last, it's the perfect plan for all our customers who are in a poor coverage area. Whether you got throttled, got an error message, or just plain can't get a signal, Data Basic provides the perfect value for customers who can't get any data anyway!
For our more advanced customers, consider moving up to our next plan:
Data Plus For $30/month, you get 0 MB of data.
Do you enjoy streaming movies, downloading music, and using FaceBook and e-mail? Neither do we! So if you never want to use any of these items, Data Plus is the ideal plan for you.
Still not enough? Power users may want to consider our highest plan:
Data Pro For $40/month, you get 0 GB of data.
One gigabyte is equal to 1,024 megabytes. That's so much data that you couldn't possibly need any of those!
What, like you have a better option?®
Terms and conditions: All data plans require a two-year agreement. If you terminate your service before the end of the two year term, you will be permanently banished into outer space. We may change the terms of the agreement at any time, including but not limited to raising the price, discontinuing the service, or forcing you to buy a used ice cream truck. The ice cream truck does not include any warranty. This offer is not valid.
-------------------- Apple News Correspondent
Captain of the Planet Express Jr.
Assistant Jedi Librarian